I came, I saw, I spoke German

So here it is. The Final One. The day that I have known was coming for many, many months, but the day I have been avoiding thinking about, choosing instead to pretend that my year abroad will carry on forever. Today is my final day in Germany.

I really cannot believe it is over. I have so many emotions coursing through my 5ft 2inch body right now, I’m not really sure how to process them. Technically, I should be helping my parents pack, especially considering they have just driven 500 miles across three countries to pick me up, but writing a blog entry is much more fun, so I’ll leave them to it.

 This has hands down been the most incredible year of my life. Nine months ago I took a step into the unknown; I did something that terrified me, stepped on a plane bound for Deutschland, knowing that I would have to survive the next 9 months in a foreign country. But do you know what; I had a bloody amazing time doing it. From the people I have met, to the places I  have seen, to the experiences I have gained, the entire thing has been an adventure. True, it hasn’t always been easy. There have been quite a few tears. But there have also been tonnes of laughs, and the great times have outweighed the difficult patches ten to one. I am going back home armed with a wealth of experience and memories that I will look back on fondly for the rest of my life.

Thousands of students go abroad every year, so from the outside looking in it might seem that 9 months in a foreign country is not that big a deal. Let me tell you, it is a big deal. It teaches you an enormous amount about yourself; about what you are and are not capable of, about what you want from life. Strange as it may seem, being able to experience German culture first-hand in all its glory - its mish-mash of traditions, dialects and cultures has also taught me a huge amount about what it is to be British. I think now I will appreciate my own culture and my own home all the more. No matter what is waiting for us just around the corner, no one will ever be able to take that away from us.

Every time I think about the fact that I won’t be going back to school on Monday, that I won’t be able to pop to Heidelberg on a spare afternoon, that I won’t be able to just gorge on all the German cake I can lay my hands on without feeling guilty, I want to burst into loud, wailing sobs. I imagine it will take a few days to sink in. Perhaps at first it will feel like I’m popping home for a short time. But I suppose after a while, as I begin to unpack the boxes and stick the photos up on my wall, I will be forced to come to terms with the fact that Bensheim won’t be waiting for me anymore, that my students won’t be expecting me back in class, that my seat in the staff room will probably be filled by someone else. I will never forget Bensheim or the Karl Kübel Schule, though. My nine months in school and the small, quintessential German town that has become my second home have been absolutely fabulous and I will miss them more than words can say.

Though this particular chapter may be over, I think in reality the real adventure is only just beginning. I am definitely not done with Germany or with Bensheim, and I look forward to returning to this weird and wonderful country many times over the years to come, to re-live some of the memories, visit some of the lovely people I have been fortunate enough to meet and remind myself that taking a leap of faith into the unknown and throwing yourself into a new life can actually be one of the best decisions you ever make.  I feel that I can go back to England knowing that I achieved what I set out to do. I made the most of my time here, (hopefully) improved my German and can face next year and whatever may follow a little wiser than I was before.

Thank you to everyone that has read this over the past 9 months. I hope I haven’t bored you all too much with my waffle.

So, the Land of Hope and Glory awaits me. It is home time.

Over and out.

Emily 

One day, baby, we'll be old.

Last week was the Year 13s' last week in school. As with many things I've noticed this year, the Germans are generally not as hardcore about things as us Brits. Leavers' days at my old school saw portacabins completely wrapped up in brown paper, classroom equipment moved onto the roof of the science block and chickens let loose in the staff room. The Germans were much more civilised. They dressed up a bit, got their reports and went home.

Naturally it made me nostalgic for my own school days. That summer after your A Levels, when your biggest concern is how long you're going to go on holiday with your friends for, and how much overtime you're going to do at work to save up those few extra pennies for Freshers. Alongside feeling envious of their long summer of freedom, this week has also given me a slight existential crisis. In a moment of panic, I realised that I am really no further forward in knowing what it is I want to do with the rest of my life than I was when I left school. I may be three years older than the Year 13s, but I certainly don't feel three years wiser.

In a way, I suppose, I've had to do a lot of growing up this year, and I'm certainly more independent than I was nine months ago. I've had my first taste of the adult world; of living on my own, doing a 'proper' job and setting up a life for myself somewhere new. This should have made me ultra-sophisticated and mature, ready to take on the world, right? 

Wrong. Despite all that I have experienced this year, to a certain extent I still feel like I'm a child in an adult's shoes - that I'm playing at being a mature and responsible person, when all the while I cannot wait to be a student again next year - the lifestyle, the comfort of the university campus, the nights out in fancy dress, the pints of purple and long lay-ins on Saturday mornings. Is that bad? 

For a little while last week I sank into an ohmygodwhatamigoingtodowithmylife-panic. I suddenly started researching internships, filling in employability questionnaires and adding pencil skirts to my basket on the John Lewis website. But then when I actually stopped and thought about it, I came to the realisation that it is ok to enjoy being young while you can. There will be all the time in the world to clip-clop around in fancy heels and have working lunches. But there is only one year left of being a student and for now, at least, that's what I'm looking forward to making the most of.

The big wide world is scary, and I haven't properly found my place in it yet. But I will do. I may have to botch it together along the way. But I will get there eventually. I read somewhere that, "To be old and wise, you must first be young and stupid." Perhaps Mr. Old and Dr. Wise are friends for another day. For now, I think I'll stick with my good pals Young and Stupid.

Emily 

"We nearly died, but it was still funny!" - Our last jolly holiday in Germany.

So that's it, our last trip away to explore a new place in Germany is over. This weekend we headed south to soak up a last bit of German culture before turning our attention to the inevitable packing up! 

As Thursday was a bank holiday in Germany, and school gave us Friday off, too, we decided to really make the most of our last trip, spreading our visits to Freiburg and Lake Constance over five days. After meeting at the station in Freiburg and walking for half an hour in the wrong direction before realising our youth hostel was entirely over the other side of the city, watching a German youth projectile vomit over the side of a bridge and nearly getting lost multiple times whilst dodging countless students off for a night out, we eventually arrived at our rather alternative hostel in Freiburg. The whole hostel had a very bohemian atmosphere to it, with cushions and rugs to sit on instead of sofas and window's in the shower cubicles. It was truly a hippie's paradise. I, however, am no hippy. It was therefore a slight shock to my system, but provided us with a lot of laughs, nonetheless. 

More important than the hostel from the 1960s, however, was the city itself, which is beautiful. Like Heidelberg, Freiburg has a huge student population, although we didn't really see too many of them on Thursday, as I imagine they were all nursing their hangovers from the night before. We explored the town a little in the morning, naturally taking pictures of every pretty-looking building possible and trying to avoid falling in the water, which casually runs through the city in little trenches by the side of the road. (Anyone who knows me well will know that not falling in was definitely easier said than done!) As it began to warm up a little, we caught a cable car up into the hills up to the Schlossberg, essentially a giant tower that gives spectacular views over the city. Looking at the Black Forest from above is truly a beautiful sight, though I did find myself clinging to the railings for dear life at some points, as the tower was definitely swaying in the wind. Back on solid ground, we headed to a much loved Mexican restaurant for a spot of lunch before hopping on the train over to Constance. 

Heading up the hill in a cable car

The road goes ever on and on...

View of the Schwarzwald

Nom.

Somewhat naively, as it now appears with hindsight, it did not even occur to me that it would not be warm, dry and sunny in Constance. I suppose I imagined that the town was concealed inside a temperate bubble; immune to the changes in weather occurring throughout the rest of Germany. I've heard so many things about Constance, the beautiful town nestled on the side of the Bodensee - a lake that spans Germany, Switzerland and Austria. I've heard that it looks absolutely beautiful in the sunshine, that on a clear day you can see the mountains rising up around the edge of the lake, that you could hire bikes and go on a beautiful cycling tour of the lake if the weather is fine. Think about that for a second. What do all of those scenarios have in common? The answer, my dear friends, is good weather. What did the weather do whilst we were there? 

It pissed it down.

So, I hear you ask, what does one do when the town is the lake and the lake is the town, but you can't even really see the lake because of all the driving rain? Simples. You eat. Which is what we did, for most of Friday anyway. We really did try to not let the weather bother us; we wandered round with our umbrellas, tried our best to ignore the puddles forming in our shoes and even made it down to the pier to photograph the revolving statue of a prostitute that welcomes the boats into the harbour (oh, Germany!). But it gets to a certain point when you are wet and cold, your morale sinks lower than your body temperature and it is time to give in and go back to the hostel for a cup of tea. We did, however, manage to venture back out again later on for a lovely meal and some cocktails, so it wasn't a complete waste of a day! 

A spinning prostitute that welcomes boats into the harbour -  must be a German thing!

Using a break in the rain to take loads of pictures!

Cocktail time!

Saturday, though I wouldn't go so far as to say it was warm or sunny, it was a little drier. This was our cue to spend as much of the day as possible outside, so we jumped on a ferry and headed over to a few little towns around the lake. Our first stop was Mainau, famous for its flowers - basically Kew Gardens on steroids - where, despite the clouds, the flowers looked beautiful. Next we hopped over to Meersberg, another little town on the side of the lake, where we stopped for a bite to eat and to enjoy the view. 

We're on a boat.

The Bodensee made of flowers

Found a potential suitor waiting for me on the island!

Back on the mainland, we still had an hour or so to kill before dinner, so we decided to hire a pedalo...

Picture the scene. Four twenty-something girls, all of reasonable levels of intelligence, all having survived a year in a foreign country whilst (almost) mastering a second language. Hiring a pedalo, in comparison to some of the things we have been through this year, should technically have been a walk in the park. Oh how wrong we were!! Emma and Sarah decided to take control first, leaving Hannah and me to sit in the back and enjoy the view. It soon transpired, however, that maybe this was not such a good idea, as the other two had some....issues with the whole steering-and-pedaling-at-the-same-time situation, especially as by this point the rather stern-looking German woman who had rented us the pedalo was standing at the edge of the water yelling instructions at us in German that we could neither hear nor understand. It was agreed by all that Hannah and I should take over (though given my track record with directions and coordination, that's debatable). By this time, however, we had bobbed out a little into open water and were now sailing precariously close to the harbour, where the ferries dock in and out of Constance. Pedaling for our lives, we shot across the harbour, managing to avoid being hit by two yachts approaching from the left and a 1000 people-capacity ferry tearing towards us from the right, not really knowing whether to hysterically laugh or cry. Though I did have visions of us not being able to get back again, bobbing out into the middle of the lake and having to be towed back again by the angry German lady, we did manage to make it back safely, though I can completely understand if the German lady wants to run for the hills the next time any English girls want to rent a pedalo! 

Think we might be about to crash into the boats there, guys!

We survived...just.

We nearly died, but it was still funny!

So I am back home in my little flat in Bensheim as I write this, knowing that my last jolly holiday in Germany is over. I have made three lovely new friends this year, and it has been so much fun travelling with them and sharing so so many giggles. Though I will still see Sarah at uni next year, I'm really going to miss our little group and look forward to our next outing that we plan once we are all back on English soil. It's scary how quickly the end is approaching, and whilst I still intend to make the absolute most of the next three weeks, the most pressing issue now, is how the bloomin' heck am I going to fit all my stuff into two boxes and a suitcase???!!! 

Wish me luck! 

Emily